Okay, so I’ve been messing around with tarot cards lately, just for fun, you know? And I keep pulling this one card, the Nine of Swords, but it’s always upside down. Reversed, they call it. At first, I was like, “What the heck does this even mean?”
So I did a little digging. Apparently, when the Nine of Swords is upright, it’s all about anxiety and feeling overwhelmed, like your thoughts are just eating you alive. But flipped over, it’s supposed to be a bit different. I read somewhere that if you’re in a relationship, this reversed card could mean you or your partner are feeling super tired, lonely, just beat, you know?
Now, I’m not really in a relationship right now, so I wasn’t sure how this applied to me. But I kept thinking about it. I’ve been feeling pretty burned out lately, working my butt off and not really seeing the results I want. And yeah, I guess I have been feeling a bit lonely, even though I’m around people all the time. It’s like I’m just going through the motions, not really connecting with anyone.

Then it hit me. Maybe this card isn’t just about romantic relationships. Maybe it’s about my relationship with myself, my relationship with my work, with my goals. I’ve been pushing myself so hard, trying to be this perfect version of myself, that I’ve forgotten to just chill out and enjoy the ride. I’ve been so focused on the destination that I’ve lost sight of the journey.
So, I decided to take a step back. I took a day off work, turned off my phone, and just did things I enjoyed. I went for a walk in nature, I read a book for fun, I cooked a meal just for myself. And you know what? It felt amazing. It was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I know I can’t go on a vacation or a relaxing trip as I don’t have the budget for it. So I tried some cheap and simple ways to relax, even though it only lasted for a few hours, it made me feel better.
I’m not saying I’ve suddenly solved all my problems, but pulling that reversed Nine of Swords was definitely a wake-up call. It made me realize that I need to be kinder to myself, to give myself a break every now and then. It’s okay to not be okay, and it’s okay to ask for help or just take a time-out when you need it. I try to make a balance between pushing myself hard and being patient and kind to myself. And that’s not always easy, but I’ll keep trying.
So yeah, that’s my little tarot adventure. It’s funny how a simple card can make you think so much about your life. I’m still not sure if I believe in all that tarot stuff, but it’s definitely given me some food for thought.